Bisquick, or, Then Things Got Weird

As a child, I indulged in Bisquick-based foods quite frequently. I like to think I was known for my fantastic drop biscuits. And, of course, my pancakes were legends in my own mind. I am sure I used my mother’s electric skillet far more than she ever did.

Over time, Bisquick and I grew apart. It wasn’t the Bisquick, it wasn’t me, it was just one of those things. We went in different directions. I started making stuff from scratch. I found solace in cooking. When my youngest sister and I start talking food on Facebook, my mother chimes in with “Where did I go wrong?”.

This didn’t change when I went gluten-free (except, you know, no more Sundays devoted to making sourdough bread, which is shaping up to be my Fall GF cooking project). I shunned prepared mixes and foods, this time with good reason. All those hidden gluten-y things. I was gluten-free, and I was going to do it my way.

Yes, that means cooking as much from scratch as my schedule permits.

Then one day, I was cruising through Amazon’s GF food selection, and noticed gluten-free Bisquick. At first, I acted all cool. Yeah, sure, it’s GF, but it’s…Bisquick. I was beyond that.

Then I became obsessed with owning this product. For some reason, I had to have it. Just had to have it. My life, I became convinced, wasn’t complete without Bisquick in my pantry.

So I bought it. Actually, I bought three boxes (Amazon being the epitome of in-your-pajamas bulk shopping). Just in case you didn’t already know, the gluten-free box of Bisquick is much smaller than the regular kind.

I had Bisquick, obviously I had to make something. Biscuits. Pancakes. A masterpiece.

Then life got in the way. Or meals didn’t roll the way I wanted them too. The needs of the GF Bisquick were different. Eggs, shortening. Picture me walking to the store Googling “shortening substitutes” because Crisco is something my grandmother stocked in bulk, but I’ve never used for cooking.

I had my Bisquick for a good three months before it was transformed into, well, my fondly remembered drop biscuits. I solved the shortening problem by cutting butter into the mix (using the pastry cutter I was surprised to discover in my drawer. When and why did I buy this?). I made those biscuits.

And they were good!

(They reheated well, too.)

Now, I wonder when I’ll repeat this brava performance. And I suspect I should check the expiration date on the boxes. Maybe it’s because I no longer think “bread” when I think of meals. Maybe it’s because I’m lazy. Most likely it’s because I’m usually running late, so adding biscuits to my menu is a nice-to-have versus got-to-have.

Still, those biscuits were good. And now I’m craving pancakes…

(Note: for fun, when I made those biscuits, I pretended I was having chicken pot pie. I split the biscuits in half, topped the bottom with my chicken pot pie filling, then replaced the top of the biscuit. Fun and different.)

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